29 april 2011

Eindhoven

(...)
I would like to know what’s important
if you know, tell me

I don’t know
I guess most important is not to worry about anything
and just grab life
by the balls
consume it
live it and then
let it go
I actually guess rhythm and sound are also important when I draw
I should be more conscious of my breathing
more conscious of this
less conscious of that
I wonder if I should travel to Japan or something
or simply to somewhere 
far away from my head especially
something I can’t really grasp
I think it would be really good for me
but also I would like someone else to tell me what’s good for me
cause I’m tired of myself thinking about myself
thinking out strategies and remedies and
allerlei projecten voor mezelf
het schiet niet op
ik weet het niet

iemand anders zou het mij eens moeten zeggen wat ik moet doen:
gooi alles weg en vertrek naar..
ja..
Libië
Afghanistan
Indië
Roemenië
Finland
Estland
Australië
Alabama
ik zou soms echt graag ontvoerd willen worden uit mijn eigen leven
dat zo’n reus me optilt en op zijn grote hand zet
and walks with me
and shows me what’s happening out there
and tells me how to deal with it
I would like to have wisdom
I would like to have love
I would like to be capable of spreading those two things
endlessly
my nose is itchy
this drawing... I don’t know
I think it sucks
but what’s important?
is it the looks of the drawing or the process while drawing?
the fact that I’m looking for wisdom and love while I’m drawing
while I’m talking
while I’m looking?
I hope..
X
my hope lies in your hands
I really think that you
will help me out of all this
you’re gonna be my savior
do you feel the pressure, darling?
jaja
don’t worry don’t worry don’t worry
but yes sometimes
I count on other people
to push my buttons
and funny enough:
they do
well well what a strange drawing have we got here
I think it needs a rest
I put it on the floor and 
I’m gonna look at the drawings I’ve been making the past few days
and get back to them or not get back to them
just try to find the line
or find
similarities and atmospheres 
the strong points and the weak points
but what I especially realize the past few days is that
die tekeningen die moeten groot zijn, jonge,
die moeten echt niet op zo kleine papiertjes staan
die moeten eindeloos uitdijen 
denk ik.

(Griet Menschaert, 2011)